Andy Barr's Blog

Well, Sunday morning, Ramses’ girl, Angelina, invited us to her Catholic Mass so, trying to learn the most about Brazilian culture, I decided to go along. It was very interesting to see. I think that in order to attract more people and recruit youth, they kind of modernized things since like 80% of the service was sing-along guitar music, and they sang happy birthday to everyone that had a birthday that week. So a very different Catholic mass than I am accustomed to, but it was interesting to watch and rapidly flip through my dictionary to try to understand. Unfortunately I still have a song that is completely stuck in my head from that day (”Saciar os vossos filhos o senhor”) and can not help but think it at least ten times a day.

Anyways, we came home, bringing Angelina with us to introduce her, and as we walk to the door she says, “Oh, sao meus parentes! (they are my relatives!) ” so when she got in she was happy to see her family and catch up. I guess that is how things are in a small town.

After she and her sister left, it was lunch time. Ramses and I were still full from the day before but we managed to eat a little, before we watched Sponge Bob/took a nap for two hours. At that point, we went with Valeria to visit her cousin and pick up some really good desserts that she makes for a living. We got some Geleia de Goiaba (guava jelly), Doce de Leite, Doce de mamao (sweet papaya skin) and candied orange peels. It was a lot of fun.

Then Valeria got her lip waxed since her cousin was doing waxing when we came. She offered me a wax job too, and always interested in new experiences, I said “estou nessa!” and before I knew it, I had my mustache ripped out with hot wax, a painful process that I would later regret but was fortunately all caught on video. After that, it was time to go back, so we went to the house, threw around the frisbee for a little, and then we were out, heading back to Brasilia.

As soon as we got back, in order to burn off at least some of the calories from the meal. Within a few minutes of playing, we noticed that there were tons of people watching us from their apartment balconies. It was getting pretty hot so we took of our shirts. We then invited some people to come down and play with us but none did. Anyways, we did that until 10 pm, when some guy yelled at us, “Silencio por favor!”. It was a lot of fun except for getting covered in fire ants at one point. I was tired and lay bare-chested on the grass to rest and before I knew it I felt all these burning feelings all over. I instantly realized my mistake, as it was really painful, but after a few minutes, a decent portion of my chest and back were numb. Luckily that went away in about 10 minutes so we were able to go on with the game.

We met a new roommate from French Guiana and after checking the fridge, we realized we had no dinner. Well, the Frisbee awakened a little appetite so we went out, but unfortunately the only place open on Sunday night past 10 pm was Subway so we reluctantly went in. The Subway in Brazil was exactly the same as the US, and as soon as Ramses and I walked in, we could easily see that the employees really did not want to help us and would rather watch TV. The only funny thing that happened while there was when we asked for chipotle sauce on our sandwiches, and the woman, in a split second, grabs the bottle and dumps a ton of the mayo sauce on our sandwich. Ramses and I, who were kind of half asleep, but were instantly awakened and were like,”NOOOOO”, causing her to stop immediately but the damage was done. Anyways, after watching Jogo Duro, a reality show, with the employees for some time, we headed back home and both were asleep in a few seconds.

So Saturday we started the very hot day nice and early, forsaking eating because of the planned churrasco for later in the day. We all went out for a long walk. Like a really long walk. A 14 kilometer walk! We got to see tons of stuff, passing by huge Mangeiras (mango trees), many mandioca plants, orange trees, eucalyptus, papaya trees, and pineapples. It was really cool. I loved to see the all the plants and the fruits on them. We also saw many birds and Marcus (Gorjel’s brother) was able to tell us all the stories about them.

The place I was at was the Brazilian equivalent of Savannah called Cerrado. The trees were exotic looking, very evolved to handle the dry conditions and fires that come often. It was a really long walk and Ramses and I did not drink any water before. It was really dry and there were vultures hanging around. I think, if you would have stopped walking and laid down, you would have fallen asleep from the heat, and then died.

When we got back, our hands were all puffy, and we drank like 6 cups of suco (juice) and lots of water. Brasilia and Goias are very dry places and I am learning to drink plenty of water, or better juice/fruits. Really, the humidity is so low, my hair dries in like 15 minutes after I get out of the shower.

Anyways, after we got back, drank a little water, it was busy time. We got started learning how to cut the meat and season (just big salt) and then we were cooking! It was very easy. The churrasquera was very nice and the meat was done in waves. First the thin cuts were ready, so we started eating that. Then as the thicker ones were ready, we would take it out for eating. This process pretty much repeated alongside things like rice and beans and other side for many hours.

After that we went outside to play Frisbee for a little. It was a lot of fun and of course, people started watching. We got a bunch of kids and people to join in, including a very attractive, tall, dark-haired girl that was probably my age. It was all fun and we were even thinking of hanging out with her, but then comes her mom with a stroller and a baby and she introduces us to that girl’s kid! So darn, but it was cool we had already arranged our dates for the night.

We then documented all the political cartoons that the children from a school made and painted on a wall that was next to the house. After that, it was time for Pao de Queijo lesson time! We were learning from the wonderful Silvia, who is a master of Pao de Queijo, and she very graciously and patiently led us through all the steps, including the complicated ones like forming the balls with lots of oil on the hands. That was a ton of fun and I feel confident that I can make it when I get back to the US.

Anyways, I had tried to call Ludimila a few times earlier, and she was busy and then she ended up in a different city, so I called her friend Rayane and went out with her. We just went to grab a juice and walked around for a time. I wasn’t out too late since she was going to a friend’s birthday party so I was back fairly early. Anyways, that was it for the day and I came home super tired, and ready for the next day.

Ramses and I got up a little late the next day and started up eating some left over Indian food from a party he had a few days ago at his house. We ate, showered, and then headed out to his lab. We got to the lab around 10ish and then two hours later, everyone left to get Chinese food (Friday tradition was to go out for lunch). The Chinese food was pretty good, but mostly it was the quantity of the food rather than the quantity. It was the same as the US Chinese food and the popular dish from the place is sweet and sour chicken.

We then had a chance to drive around a little since someone needed to pick up a car from the shop. Brasilia is a really interesting city since it was completely planned out so it is optimized for driving. If it wasn’t for the radar, I think it would be one giant racetrack. I say that because the roads were made to not intersect pedestrian areas so there are no stoplights or anything. Also, another downside is that apart from the main beautiful plaza, the city looks exactly the same everywhere. Literally, all the blocks have the same apartments, same mini mall with a few stores, and every two blocks there is a grocery store. The streets also are not named, just given letters and numbers to make it very easy to navigate.

Anyways, after that, Ramses gets a call from his friend Gorjel, and I am informed that in 10 minutes, we are leaving to Ipamerim for the weekend! So before even knowing what that is, I packed my backpack and he was there. So off we were in the car for the four hour trip to the countryside of Brasil. The car ride was a pretty incredible tour of a part of Brazil I had yet to see. About an hour from Brasilia, there ceased to be cities and we were really in the country. The state of Goias has tons of farming, so there were places where I could just see wheat and soy plants in every direction. I saw tons of cows, feeding on endless seas of grass. There were also places where they cultivated eucalyptus and you could see them going on for as far as the eye could see.

It was a little sad though since much of the land there was once forest, but the trees were killed to make room for farming. You could still see tons of the Brazilian savannah, marked by the dry twisty trees. One thing about this area is that it is very dry. You will notice that your mouth is constantly dry, and my hair dries very fast when I leave the shower. Anyways, we continued and before we knew it it was dark.

It became very dark very fast. You could see stars everywhere. We stopped and looked around for a bit and it was simply incredible. You could see the Milky Way and the Zodiacal Cloud. The moon was low in the horizon and was a little red crescent (it was eclipsed) and it was very cool. The moon in the Southern Hemisphere is rotated 90 degrees from how we are used to seeing it so it looked like a little red bowl. After that, we continued, stopped and got some churrasquinho (sticks of chicken hearts and chicken wrapped in bacon, coated in farofa), and then kept on going.

We finally made it to Ipamerim around 8 pm. It was a really small town but the house we were staying at was very nice. We had a little snack and then it was time for Ramses and I to head to the Praza and xavecar (talk to girls). Well, we did, and we did well! We talked with a group of dark haired girls and I made plans to see a girl named Ludimilia the next day. Then, afterward, we kept going around, and I had the idea to innocently ask the next girl for a place to find Forro nearby. Well, no sooner than 30 seconds after coming up with that, a very attractive, tall blond Italian girl walks in our direction and so I asked her about where to find Forro. Well, it was very fun to talk to her and we had a lot of fun talking and dancing for a bit in the plaza. She didn’t even believe we were really American. She had never met one before and thought it was just something we were saying to meet girls, but after Ramses showed her his ID, she believed. Anyways, since I had already made plans with a beautiful black haired girl, I told Ramses that he could go out with Angelina, and so with our woman all set up for the next day, we went home, watched some Sponge Bob, talked for sometime with the family, and then were off to bed!

So Thursday I woke up early, finished my last bit of packing, and said sad goodbyes to Guaracy’s family and all the people that were at his house. My new beautiful chimarrao cup (a wonderful present from Alicia) was inaugurated and everyone for some reason wanted a picture next to me as I drank it. After saying goodbye to everyone that I had come to know and love, I got on my little airplane to [Riberao-Preto](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ribeir%C3%A3o_Preto) in Sao Paulo state.

When I say little, I mean it had seats for like 20-30 people and was propeller powered. That first flight was quite scary, the whole time being very bumpy and at one point, as we were descending, we dropped for like 2 whole long seconds and I actually thought I was going to die. Thankfully, I did not throw-up, and the second the plane landed, I breathed a humongous sigh of relief. Riberao Preto is a city of around 1 million people, but their airport would not give you that impression. The airport was tiny, only having a little bookstand, a shoe shining place, a bar/pao de quiejo thing, a small check-in counter, and a small place to get toys. I remember landing and feeling incredibly hot. The sun was just beating down very hard. I thought about going to the city for the three hours I was to wait there. I went outside to look around and there were like 3 dogs in the entrance, just laying down, looking nearly dead in the sun. There was one more flight after mine and then I was the only person in the airport (other than the store workers, security, and airline employees) for about two hours. It was killer I did plenty of reading and soon enough, was on a little propeller plane to Brasilia.

Thank goodness, the second plane ride was much smoother than the first one, and I made it to Brasilia without problem. I got to see the airport/shopping mall and then was able to get picked up by my buddy Ramses and his friend from his lab. We went to the lab, had a quick tour, picked up the other dudes and then it was time for pizza. The pizza place we went to was called Molho de Tomate (tomato sauce) and was the cheap pizza place for college students. It was different than anywhere I had been to. You go to the window, give some money to be turned into red and yellow coins, and then take those coins to the counters where you trade them for fresh baked pizza. Each slice of cheese was 1 real and all the others were 2. I got a few slices, trying the college way of taking two cheese pizzas, putting them on top of each other, and making a sandwich out of them.

I also had my first pizza doce. I had heard about the sweet pizzas not really interested in trying it, but Ramses insisted so I got a pizza with banana, leite condensada, cheese, and cinnamom (and maybe another kind of sauce). Oh man, it was something different! I did not know what to think my first bite but after a few minutes, I decided I like the cheese/banana/chocolate combination.

After eating pizza, everyone was very interested in showing me Forro so we picked up some people, and headed out. Forro is a dance that is more traditional and favored by people in the “interior”. By around 11 pm, we finally got to the place to dance Forro and it was packed! We all got our dance on, and after doing a bit of watching and learning some steps from a girl that came along, I decided it was time to hit the floor. I spent around an hour and a half “atropelando pes” (stepping on women’s feet) and then took a little break. I had been doing good talking and meeting many girls, and my xavecos (things said to pick up women) were very good that night but I was tired of dancing, so, just for fun, I found the most attractive girl in the room and went to talk to her. Well, it turned out that she hated dancing and so we spent the next hour + talking and now we have plans for her to show me the city this week. Finally, by around 2 am, we got back to Ramses’ place and I was asleep the minute I got on the couch.

My bus arrived about an hour early in Iguacu, around 5 am. So I had some time to kill.

I took a bus to the center to see if there was anything going on there. I ended up getting there around 6ish, and made my way down avenida Brasil to the HSBC at the other end to get some money. By the time I was done, I found a little corner store that was getting a fresh shipment of salgados for the day and had a esfirra de carne and a coixinha de trigo. I grabbed a beijinho (little ball of I think condensed milk and coconut) to leave and then made my way to the bus terminal. I walked past the Brasilian army place and got to watch some marching and listen to a band play. That ate some more time, and then I made it to a bus to Iguacu.

The national park entrance was a little ways away from the city, and within about a minute of getting on the bus, I was fast asleep. Luckily, the bus was full of Brazilian workers and guides for the park, so a very nice woman kindly woke me up when I got to my stop. I got to the park just in time for the opening and paying 21 reais (a little less than 11 dollars), got on the first bus to take me to the falls.

Inside the park they use double-decker buses and drive very slowly through the forest to make sure animals are not killed as they cross the road. My bus was the very first bus let into the park and there were only a few others on board ( a group of seniors from US/Paraguay, some Germans, an Italian couple, and a young family). Because of the small group, I was able to make my way straight to the falls, and by the time I reached them, I was literally by myself.

The falls themselves were quite incredible. The trail really takes you up close to them. It is hard to explain the feeling of awe upon being surrounded by such a large volume of falling water. Since I was by myself, I could really just sit there and listen to the loudness of the falls. It was surprisingly, not very cold, in spite of the big blasts of water that were coming from the falls, making it seem like there was quite a bit of wind. I took some good pictures there, managing to balance the camera on the railing to take some shots with me in them with the timer mode.

The platform at the Garganta do Diabo (Devil’s throat) is situated right in front of one level of falls, and literally on top of some others. If you are afraid of heights, it is not a good place for you. I even got a little freaked out when I looked over one edge and saw another 100 feet of waterfall right below me!

At one point, I was staring for so long into the falls in front of me, that I got really dizzy, to the extent that when I looked away and started to walk, I actually fell down! Luckily it didnt hurt so much and after taking a breather for a minute, I got into the elevator and made my way up to the top platform. That was the time to be really afraid of heights! but I survived and witnessed another incredible view. From the top you could see the suckers on the Argentine side as well.

I bought some things at the store there and then left on the forest trail to head back. I love animals, but that love is normally reserved for just looking at them. On the trail back, I started getting followed by these raccoon/anteaters with pointy claws, and at one point had about 7 of them behind me. They started getting closer to my shoes and next thing I knew, I was running pretty fast away from them. I got to a crowd though, and the animals kind of dispersed. The people in the crowd were much braver than me, getting close and taking pictures so I decided to take some (from a safe distance) and then leave the park.

My next trip was to the Usina Hidroeletrica called Itaipu. It is the largest currently operating dam in the world and I wanted to go on the tour. I took a few buses to take me there, and once again fell asleep. Once again, I was woken up by a student who was heading there.

I got off the bus, and followed a group of people going in. They all went past the checkpoint so I just continued with them. About thirty seconds later, I hear someone saying “oi! oi!” and I look behind me and see a soldier with a huge machine gun strapped to his back and he is looking right at me. I didn’t realize the group of people I was with was a group of students and everyone had a little badge dangling from their neck. Luckily he was cool and he helped me to the visitors center.

I then got on a very cool tour, paying an extra 5 reais (2.50) for a special circuit where I got to go into the dam and see some of the power generating equipment. I thought 2 hours was going to be a lot for a dam tour but it was over before I knew it. The dam was really incredible and took around 30 years to build. The sheer size of it was a wonder on the magnitude of the falls. There were some parts where you could look over the edge and it was just a straight drop for over a hundred feet. I really liked it and met some cool people my age on the tour.

I met two girls and one guy who were visiting from Medianeira and Mato Grosso do sul. They invited me to see Era de Gelo 3 (Ice Age 3) with them but I wanted to see Paraguay. This one extremely attractive blond girl took a liking to me and encouraged me to see the movie with them. I think she thought I would ditch Paraguay to be with her, but man was she wrong! hahaha She was a little upset when I left and I think she thought she had convinced me to stay, but I was far more pumped to go to Paraguay.

I got off the bus right next to the bridge at the border and made my way across. I was so glad I was crossing by foot. The traffic on the bridge was horrible, with motorcycles and trucks all very close to each other, inching their way across. I got to the border and passed the Brazilian part with no trouble.

I was a little worried since I knew Americans are required to have visas to cross. I talk to the guard and he tells me that Americans need visas to enter and informed me that they cost $50 US, even for a day. I told him I just wanted to eat dinner there and maybe buy a book or something. Ok, he tells me, $20 US will be good. Oh man! $20 US, I don’t have that kind of money on me. I just want to go in and out for two hours. Alright. $10 US. A little better, but I really don’t have $10 US on me. He tells me tough luck, but then I pull out 5 reais, 4 Argentine pesos, and 1 US dollar and he says I am good!

So I get my Paraguay stamp in my passport and I am into Ciudad del Este. It is very hard to describe Ciudad del Este without using the words, mess, disorder, and busy. It is like Brazil’s Tijuana. As a result of Brazil’s high taxes on imports, the place is swarming with Brazilians who are there buying everything from perfumes, computers, and Calvin Klein underwear. I saw whole families from Brazil, with each member carrying bags in each hand.

It is hard to convey how crazy it was. Luckily, Paraguayans are very cool and easy to talk with, even if you are not buying anything, so I talked with plenty of people. I met a very cool Peruvian family and after showing them my Cruz Andina I wear on my neck and talking a little about Peruvian food and music they were very happy to see me. They gave me a little bracelet and invited me over. Since I only had a little time in Paraguay, I told them I couldn’t but they gave me shopping tips and the girl my age came with me to help me find a cookbook. No luck on that though! I ended up only buying a very tasty, big and juicy empanada while there.

I got to the one shopping mall and talked to some lovely and very attractive Paraguayan women. I then returned to my “tia peruana” (Peruvian aunt) and she told me it was best to leave the city before nightfall. I couldn’t agree more, so I said goodbye, and made my way back to Brazil. By the time I made it to the bridge a half and hour later, it was around 7 and it was fully dark. Looking back, I could see trash strewn everywhere on the streets. It was sad to see such a mess in the city. Also, there were quite a bit of cops that had come out, patrolling the corners and walking up and down the streets with some menacingly large shotguns! The bridge and the quarter mile before it was nearly stopped traffic with everyone trying to get to Brazil. I think Brazil recently banned tire imports since there were all these signs saying “No Import of Tires into Brazil” (but in Portuguese) and everywhere around me, I could see people with wheelbarrows full of tires, and other people shoving tires in the back of their cars. I would have taken a picture but I don’t think they would have appreciated that.

I crossed in easily, took a taxi to the center, ate a coixinha de mandioca (yuca!) and drank some acai com, banana, and then made my way back to the bus. My bus left at 9:30 pm and I was able to sleep pretty easily.

Sometime around 2 am, our bus was stopped by government agents at one of the toll places. One came on board and he noticed some bags that were stowed all around the bus. They all belonged to one guy and he said they were all just full of clothes (he obviously bought them in Paraguay). I think they made him take them outside and show he wasn’t a serious smuggler or something. It was funny to see how worried some of the people got because they were afraid of getting taxed or fined for bringing in stuff from Paraguay. Luckily we weren’t stopped very long. I got to sleep a little bit longer but it was hard since the woman next to me didn’t know how to keep her arms nor legs in her seat so I got woken up a few times from collisions with limbs.

I got to Curitiba about 7 am. Got a little lost in the city, but managed to bus back and be back to Guaracy’s home by 8:30 am, just in time for breakfast, and right after, sleep!

I had already spent Saturday in Sabbath/church mode so I decided to spend Sunday with the family.

We had a nice breakfast, where I was introduced to something that I think is called Sapo. Whatever the name is, it is a bunch of chopped fruits that have been slightly cooked in grape juice, along with something that I can only describe as large tapiocas (though not like the bubble tea sized pearls). I also got to meet two of Mara’s relatives who had come to visit, including her aunt and her cousin.

I then went to the nice Barigui park with Guaracy and after a quick power walk around the lake (4 km) we got to playing Frisbee for a little. In spite of some serious wind difficulties, we were able to play for some time. We got home, had some lunch and then it was Iguacu planning time.

Thanks to Guaracy’s help and expertise, before I knew it, I had tickets to Iguacu and back. I only brought a little plastic bag with me, to carry an extra coat and another plastic bag for the cameras in case I decided to do the macuco safari. Before I knew it, it was time to go, and Guaracy and I were off to the bus station. He dropped me off and next thing I knew it, I was on my way to Iguacu.

I was very lucky to get my ticket (it was the last one available, and we watched 4 sell right before). Unfortunately, I was sat next to a big guy who was clearly a smoker and next to me on the other side was the bathroom. So it was kind of a smelly trip, but thankfully I fell asleep fast and remained asleep for the majority of the 9 hour trip.

Saturday is the adventist Sabbath, so I was up early at 7:30 am, and somehow made it to church by 9 am in a suit and tie. About 30 minutes into the service, I decided the best way to understand the fast spoken-shouted Portuguese sermon would be to lower my head, close my eyes, and focus on the words. Well, about 20 minutes later I woke up! but I was able to understand quite a bit. I enjoyed the class and liked to see some of the people I had met last week.

After church, Guaracy decided to take us all, including Mara and his mother and his wife, to the Old Madalosso. If you don’t remember, this was the Italian Restaurant I went to my second day in Curitiba. It originally was a family restaurant, started by Brazilians of Italian descent, but it spawned the Novo Madallosso which is now the second biggest restaurant in the world. That is right across the street from the old one. Well, both places were PACKED for Saturday lunch so we waited half an hour for a table at the more intimate Old Madalloso (Madalloso Velho). Luckily, they would bring out plates of fresh, hot polenta fries, covered in cheese, so the wait wasn’t so bad.

This time I was also prepared and knew not to accept any small cups of a milky-like drink from Guaracy (that is some form of alcohol that I think was mixed with milk. whatever it is it looks really tasty, but as I learned from a brief sip last time, alcoholic) I think I should explain a little better how the place works. As soon as you sit down, you are delivered salads, polenta fries, hot risotto, and some fried chicken medallions ( I don’t know what part of the chicken it is, but it was very tasty). Then, from there, waiters carrying plates of spaghetti, gnocchi, lasagnas, and other Italian dishes come by and offer you portions. They are happy to serve you little samples, so it is a great way to try many things. This time I was prepared though, and I knew to save the majority of space for meat. I had some incredible beef roast, along with sausage and I think some lamb.

After the meal, we want back home, and I spent the next few hours playing a lot of piano, going over some of the songs I had bought from Argentina. I did some reading, studying, napping, a little Frisbee with Guaracy and his wife and then it was time for the night service. I went with Mara to the service, enjoyed hearing lots of music, and then went out with the same group of friends from last week. We all hopped in cars and made it to a pizza place. Everyone said that I was speaking much better than I was last week, in spite of me still mixing in some Spanish as a result of my Buenos Aires trip. I got to meet some new people and was able to saw a lot more things (thanks to some research on Portuguese language Wikipedia). It was very fun and we ended up getting home around midnight.

I spent the majority of the day walking around. I hadn’t figured out how to bus it around by then. I had a handful of addresses to visit so I just kind of made my way to them. I got a few empanadas for breakfast that were tasty but declined the seat in a coffee shop for a few hours since I had places to get to. I tried getting to La Boca but bailed on the bus after 40 minutes and hardly being anywhere near there. I made it walking to Recoleta which was no small feat.

That is the very nice area of the city, with tons of great shopping in stuff. I saw lots of cool old buidlings. I also wanted to visit the MALBA (museum) and managed to get very close before relenting and taxiing. I got there early, before the museum opened, so I went to a “Shopping” (just like in Brazil the malls were called Shoppings) and decided that I really really liked the shopping in Argentina! The exchange rate between the dollar and peso was great! All the Argentine brands were really cool. It was interesting to note that most of the pants I tried that were marked my size were too tight. That is not normally a problem for me!

I ended up finding a cool store, Ayres Not Dead and really enjoyed the stuff I found there. I put a nice knit hoodie on hold (that I ended up buying later on) and talked for some time with the incredibly attractive store clerks. I then went to the MALBA and got in for free (since it was Wednesday and I am a student), and I loved the museum. Oh man. I think I stayed there for who knows how many hours. It was all good until I went in to watch some videos. The first two were interesting and genuinely made you think, but I saw part of one called “Prehistoria” and it was all with crudely drawn cartoons, but as soon as the main character started eating his babies and taking his pants off, I left there. Unfortunately it was one of those disturbing art videos that kind of makes you down for the rest of the day.

The city was cloudy and kind of rainy so that was the whole vibe kind of. I made my way walking around for a few more hours. I kept trying to get to the water, but at one point I was nearly there and ran into slums so I decided not to go there. I found the Muslim center and saw some cool Muslim-Argentines. I get along well with Muslims of any race.

Then after, I found the huge metallic flower. I really don’t know what it was made for but it was very spectacular. I stayed there for a little and read some. I tried getting back to Recoleta but ended up coming across a public park that had been converted into a center for people who ran dog related businesses. It was like nothing I had ever seen. Dogs were tied all along the fence, just barely far enough away from eachother to prevent them from killing eachother. Also, every tree had one or two together. These were every kind of dog, big and small. The noise was quite deafening. By the look of the operation, and the people that were handling the dogs, I surmised that what they were doing was not quite legal and I wasnt in a place where the general public was supposed to be, so I quietly made my way through the park without taking any pictures.

I then ended up near Palermo and did some exploring there. I continued to shop and stuff, buying a few alfajores along the way. I literally walked that whole day and saw tons of parks and statues. By the time it was night I had found a good place that served traditional food alongside pizzas and the normal milanesas and steaks. Cool, it was crowded, it must be tasty, so I decided to wait it out. I ended up getting a bit lost, but I made my way back and the place by then had emptied considerably. I ordered a cazuela, the house specialty, which was a tasty stew of squash, corn, meat, and bacon. I really enjoyed it and it was perfect for the cold night. The people at the restaurant were very typical of the people from BA. I dont think I more than 15 works were spoken to me by the waitress there during the whole night. It was very strange.

The people in general kept very much to themselves. Anyways, after eating the meal and leaving kind of hungry. I tried making my way home, which turned out to be over 2 miles on Google Maps (things tend to seem much closer when they are on Google Maps) and after around 45 minutes stopped for ice cream. I was hoping for just a little cone to finish of the day. Guaracy had recommended that I try ice cream so I didn’t want to miss it. I saw a little tiny cone for 8 pesos, and though the price seemed strangely high, I ordered anyway. As I watched the lady scoop my mixed fruit flavored ice cream, I was a little disappointed at the small scoop she put in the cone and then proceeded to flatten. I was then very surprised to see her roll a cone shaped mass of ice cream at least 6 inches tall and plunk it right on my cone! It was incredible. I didn’t even understand how that much ice cream could stay up on the cone. I was so happy to see so much ice cream on the cone, just like a little kid, and within a minute outside, jumped to the conclusion that I would have to eat the ice cream very fast before it lost its structural integrity. I then continued wandering around for a bit and eventually made it back around 1ish.

This morning was pretty eventful.

I woke up really early and did the whole Argentine breakfast thing. I got packed and showered and out of the house pretty early, like around 7. It was still pretty dark, but already many cafes were pretty packed. I made my way to one that was fairly close to my place, that looked like it had a ton of people. I told the waitress to choose two of the best pastries for me and bring a hot chocolate. I got two things that were crossaint looking but with a very heavy dough texture unlike a croissant. I could taste orange and cream in both of them. The chocolate was interesting too. It came as a big cup of milk with a whole ton of thick syrup in the bottom.

Anyways, I did the Argentina thing and sat reading a book there for 30 minutes. I watched the other people doing their reading, conversing, and computing. Afterward, I got back to the hotel, grabbed my backpack, paid what I owed for the room for three nights ($60) and got out of there. The viejo that works there was really nice, super helpful, and most of all trustworthy, but I was glad not to have to sleep there again. Lets just say that when I flushed the toilet, a ton of water squirted out the back of it, among other things that were kind of gross about the hotel. Thankfully, it had a beast of a shower, like the one in Seinfeld, where the pressure and heat was killer.

After that, I had two hours left until time to head to the airport so I decided to make the most of my time. I ran to the metro, jetted over to the plaza de Mayo. Took some pics of the Casa Rosada in the day. Got back. Picked up some alfajores to take home. I tried to find some underwear since I have been wearing the same pair for over 4 days and I didn’t want to come back smelly (I cologned them a lot and hung them to dry), but I did not find any on the way. I grabbed a really good Milanesa sandwich with chimichurri and by then it was starting to get a bit late.

My hunger had ate up my bus money so I now had to find an HSBC in short time and get to the bus station to get my ticket to the airport. After about ten minutes I ate my pride and got a taxi to take me to the bus station. I barely made it and now got to the airport two hours early. I got checked in fast and paid the 18 dollar airport tax. That was a very annoying process. I kept on having to go back and forth between the machine and the woman because when she said “sesenta y nueve pesos” she talked so soft I could barely understand. I thought she said “cinquenta y nueve pesos” so I ended up walking back and forth like three times.

Anyways, I am here now, trying to kill the last 20 or so pesos I have and the little time I have here. The attendant for the computer area is really strange. She is playing a hardcore game of minesweeper and I have already heard “mierda!” or other things like 3 times from her direction. She also has her blouse like completely unbuttoned and is only wearing a sports bra underneath not that I was looking or anything, but it is impossible not to notice. It was just really strange to see that in an airport were everyone has to be so official.

Ok folks, these are the pathetic losers who tried to mess with my son:

You worthless piles of Chihuahua excrement are about to become a meme. A meme that will travel farther and wider that you ever will.

I want this picture to become the de facto internet standard image to be used whenever you need to portray a pair of clueless scumbags. Take this picture, Photoshop it, enhance it, caption it, put it up on posters, I don’t care. Let’s make these guys so internet famous so that their respective mothers will seek plastic surgery to disassociate themselves from their devil-spawn. Let’s figure out who they are and make sure that the entire world knows to simply laugh at them.

If you see these scumbags on the street, kick them in the balls, take a good picture (their grimacing face, your motion-blurred, jack-booted foot, and their crotch must be visible), and send it my way. Catch and kick one of these turds and you get $10, both and you’ll get $20.

If you are “Moe’s” barber, you’ve got nothing to brag about either.